I am hesitant but she obviously has no problem with it. Not only is this not considered socially acceptable but it may cause a rift in your fathers relationship as well. I would suggest not pursuing this. They have all been living together for a year now and I refused to meet them because me and my dads relationship is really non existent since he cheated on my mom like 6 years ago. I have never gotten over it and we rarely speak. I don't even speak with him now that I am hanging out a lot with this girl. I only agreed on meeting them since I will most likely be going to the wedding.
Yeah man, I know it may not be the answer you want to hear then but it's something that is best to avoid. Mind you this is only my opinion though.
On the one hand it's not like you were raised together like brother and sister, so the "icky" factor isn't really there. However, there is still a host of potential problems that could arise if you two get together, especially if the relationship doesn't last as, statistically, most relationships between people in your age-rang don't last. Frankly, I also question her motives, particularly in the way she's been so physically aggressive towards you.
Her mother just gets remarried and then she immediately goes after her new older stepbrother? I don't know if this is her way of deliberately trying to cause trouble, maybe get back at her mother for something. I just really have a bad feeling about it. I say tell her no. Be polite but firm, say you do like hanging out with her but you can never date or do anything else.
Is it incestious date your step sibling?
I expressed those same feelings towards her when she asked me last night about what if might not work out etc. She told me that I never come there anyway and hardly see her mother or my dad so it would not matter if it didn't work out. I could just carry on. But my friends think otherwise and I cant help but see this as incest even if we are not blood related. She is very confident about this and her sister now knows after last night and told me it doesn't bother her.
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I guess I can chalk that up to being 17, as most kids that age don't properly think through the consequences of their actions. So there you go.
A moment of passion with my step-brother split our family for ever
You sound like you're not interested and don't want to do it. So don't do it. So why are you even here?
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Are you hoping someone will convince you otherwise? At 17, she might just see you as that really cool college guy who's ahead of her in school like the freshmen dating the seniors. Socially acceptable shouldn't be a factor. There are a lot of things that are socially acceptable in certain parts of the country that would be totally offensive in others.
That sounds like a whole can of worms that you don't want to open. She sounds like she has a few of her own problems to sort out, you even state several times that it makes you feel uncomfortable, just imagine that times for your whole family. I know it's awkward, but you need to talk to her asap and get this settled straight, before you lead her on. Something about this seems sketchy, not on your end, on hers.
Maybe she is doing this just to cause trouble for her mom's new husband. Something just does not seem right here beyond the step sibling aspect. It's a strange situation, yes. To be fair, you two didn't grow up together and you're not blood-related so given the context, it isn't as bad as it sounds. You have to talk to her about how she feels about it. You two can go on one date and just feel it out, a bit.
Does it still feel right? Does it feel strange?
You two can see each other but withhold any sexual contact 'til you both feel right about the relationship. Instead, a parent might say something like this to his son: If that ever happens to you, it doesn't mean you are bad or a disappointment to God. There will be lots of times in life that you have sexual thoughts or feelings toward other people, but it would be inappropriate for you to act on them or keep thinking about the person in that way. So if it happens, ask God to help you to stop thinking about your stepsibling in that way. And make sure you don't dishonor the other person by acting on the attraction or thoughts.
If the thoughts keep happening and you get concerned about it, feel free to talk to me. I won't be angry. We'll find a way to handle it. The last section dealt with prevention. What do you do if stepsiblings have already been romantically or sexually involved with one another? Here are some suggestions to consider.
Each parent should take primary responsibility for their child. You will need to have many discussions with your children about what happened, how it happened, what they are feeling toward one another, and how you will manage the relationship in the future. Spend lots of time talking as a couple to make sure you have the same expectations for the children, then communicate them to your child. This will not be a one-time conversation. Sexual sin has many emotional, psychological, spiritual, and familial consequences. You will be processing these consequences and life lessons for a long time.
What About Everyone Else? You will have to decide as a couple how to manage the rest of your family. Are there other siblings who are aware of the situation? I believe they should know at some point, but when? What developmental matters of the other children e. Will you tell extended family members? Why or why not? There is no universal answer to these question; each will have to be based on your circumstances.
Decide together what consequences to impose. Helping children learn from their decisions sometimes involves punishment. Decide together how you will respond to what has happened and follow-through.
Step Siblings are Dating Each Other
Be sure, however, to balance your discipline with reinforcing statements of love and assurance. Overreacting in anger and shaming a child without messages of acceptance can drive them further into sin. Make sure physical boundaries are clear. The emotional chaos and anxiety that will result from sexual lines being crossed will necessitate structure and clear boundaries for everyone.
Try to remove temptations. In other words, once kids have had sex, doing so again becomes a lot easier. The most awkward boundary to discuss is future physical affections. Can the children go back to a time of innocence? They need to be able to express appropriate affection, yet doing so may be confusing.
In addition, how will you know when your fears are exaggerating the circumstances? All of these issues will need to be discussed and sorted-out over time. And what about affections between other family members? Not wanting to encourage repeated behavior by the children, the wife became fearful of showing her husband affection both publically and privately.